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12 Leaked Questions From CNNís Upcoming Presidential Debate
By HatetheSwamp
June 19, 2024 10:16 am
Category: Media

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Check back a week from Friday to note how prescient this is:

"Which of President Trump's crimes should he be executed for?": With so many to choose from, this will be an important opportunity for each candidate to show wisdom.

"Are you a convicted felon?": Only candidates who answer "no" will be allowed to stay in the race.

"If you were on a boat with a giant battery and the boat started to sink and there were sharks in the water, would you stay on the boat and risk electrocution or jump in the water and risk a shark attack?": Just like Abraham Lincoln and John Breckinridge were asked in 1860.

"Please demonstrate your fitness for being president by standing perfectly still with your arms stiffly to the side and staring blankly ahead.": Biden has reportedly been practicing his response to this question for years.

"What's the most illegal thing you've ever done, and don't worry, you totally won't be indicted for it?": Clearly an unbiased question intended to illicit honest and relatable answers and not in any way a trap for any specific candidate.

"Mr. Trump, why are you such a loser?": The voters deserve to know.

"How many Pearl Harbors and 9/11s does it take to equal one Jan 6?": A simple mathematical question that will establish the gravity of the worst day in human history.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, rate your daughter.": Only the creepiest of answers will suffice.

"Who shot first, Han or Greedo?": One of the most important questions of our time.

"This question is for Trump. Why are you the literal personification of evil on planet Earth?": Any professional journalistic organization would ask this question.

"Follow-up question for Biden. How ya doin' pal?": Elected officials have to face tough questions.

"President Biden? Hello? Can you hear us, sir?": Quick, cut to a commercial break! Here's a word from our sponsors!


Note: The one specifically for Trump is what po's been asking since Trump came down the escalator.


Cited and related links:

  1. babylonbee.com

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Comments on "12 Leaked Questions From CNNís Upcoming Presidential Debate":

  1. by Curt_Anderson on June 19, 2024 10:32 am
    Do I detect Republican paranoia? Sounds like somebody is afraid that Joe Biden will have an advantage in the debate. Come to think of it, I haven't recently heard Trump say that Biden has dementia. Now, Hannity and FOX talkers are afraid that Biden is taking some sort of debate enhancer substance.


  2. by HatetheSwamp on June 19, 2024 10:43 am

    Trump noted that he'll be debating three people and, as in 020, no doubt, the moderator(s) will be advocating for the "dithering and diminished" Doddering Old Fool.

    But, no. Not paranoia. GOPs do know how to laugh, though. Baha.


  3. by Curt_Anderson on June 19, 2024 10:53 am
    Yup, MAGA-ville is worried. Whatever happened to Trump and his minions claiming Biden was practically braindead and Biden's handlers were afraid to have him debate Trump?


  4. by HatetheSwamp on June 19, 2024 11:06 am

    Being the Fox aficionado that you are, I'm sure you know better than I that the people on the right are of two minds.

    Some expect the Juiced-up Joe who screamed and stammered his way through the SOTU at 200 words per minute... and, to universal, enthusiastic white woke acclaim. Others the blank-eyed, stiff, walked-off-stage by the One Flatulent Fool who will be carried across the finish line with the help of CNN moderators... as the article envisions.

    Me? I'm expecting the first guy.


  5. by Indy! on June 19, 2024 11:21 am

    Curt: "Whatever happened to Trump and his minions claiming Biden was practically braindead and Biden's handlers were afraid to have him debate Trump?"


    Easy enough to explain, Curt - allow me... This the one thing Fox and religion have in common - they... ahem... "update" their "facts" to keep them up with the changing geography of reality.


  6. by Curt_Anderson on June 19, 2024 11:56 am
    Trump repeatedly challenged Biden to debate him, anywhere, anytime. Biden accepted the challenge. A debate venue was offered. Trump agreed to the rules, format, time and location. Now Trump is whining about it and making up excuses for the debate he apparently expects to lose.



    HtS,
    What is this magical debate/speech elixir that you constantly allude to? If anybody is likely to be a motormouth in the debates, it's Trump. Remember the last debates when Trump was yammering while it was Biden's turn to speak. An exasperated Biden finally exclaimed, "will you shut up, man?!".



    By the way, it's true that the other guy's microphone will be muted, but Trump can still interrupt Biden from across the stage.


  7. by HatetheSwamp on June 19, 2024 12:00 pm

    What is this magical debate/speech elixir that you constantly allude to? If anybody is likely to be a motormouth in the debates, it's Trump.

    That remains to be seen.

    And, between you and ole pb? pb's been thinking that the muting of the mikes is the only advantage for Trump in the whole thing.


  8. by Indy! on June 19, 2024 8:37 pm

    I'll watch the debates when they let real people ask real, unrehearsed, unedited, unknown questions of the candidates. I could walk in there and eliminate every candidate on the dais with one or two simple questions every one would like to hear answered, but no one in the media has the balls to ask because they know their corporate masters will yank their chains back hard if they step out of line.


  9. by Curt_Anderson on June 19, 2024 8:47 pm
    What are your one or two simple questions?

    Those "townhall" events maybe elicit some interesting questions. Often they are hyperlocal or hyper-personal.

    I don't remember the question, but I recall Bill Clinton responding "I feel your pain" or some such. Bush the elder seemed flummoxed by the lady's question.


  10. by Indy! on June 19, 2024 8:50 pm

    Every question had to be pre-approved at the Town Halls (which were really not Town Halls) - and they picked people based on their race or sexual identity, etc... instead of who had the most interesting or revealing questions.

    So far as MY questions? The first one I would turn to the audience and ask "Whatever happened to the 'best and brightest' candidates? Do we no longer have any standards for the 'most powerful position on earth'?"


  11. by Curt_Anderson on June 19, 2024 9:05 pm
    To answer your would-be question, it's primaries that ruined things. That's why we don't get the best and the brightest. One or two states early in the primary calendar and the relatively few, often highly partisan, one-issue voters in either party choose the candidates.

    In the old days, party delegates (mostly local and state-level politicians representing the entire country) would vote for the candidates at their parties' conventions. They might hold two dozen more votes until some candidate reached 50% +1. Candidates would drop out and endorse former rivals. Sometimes they'd select a "dark horse" who hadn't even announced their candidacy before the convention. There also wasn't the endless campaigning. Those contested conventions managed to select some pretty good candidates including Lincoln and FDR.


  12. by Indy! on June 20, 2024 12:32 am
    There should definitely be a time limit on the primaries and the general campaign.


  13. by Curt_Anderson on June 20, 2024 8:13 am
    RFK Jr. was not invited to the ball. He did not meet the requisite polling numbers, nor did he meet the ballot access requirements. He is only on the ballots of six states.


  14. by Indy! on June 20, 2024 10:05 am

    He could have been on 50 ballots and leading the race and he wouldn't have been invited.


  15. by Curt_Anderson on June 20, 2024 10:29 am
    Sure he would have. Ross Perot and John Anderson took part in the debates in similar circumstances.

    Jill Stein and Chase Oliver met as much or more of the debate criteria as RFK Jr.

    Btw, X and cable news network NewsNation are planning to host live town halls with former President Trump and independent presidential hopeful Robert F. Kennedy Jr. But my guess is that Trump will cancel.


    axios.com


  16. by HatetheSwamp on June 20, 2024 12:31 pm

    I don't think the Orange Turd will cancel. His thing this time around is to go everywhere.


  17. by Indy! on June 20, 2024 4:35 pm

    Sure he would have. Ross Perot and John Anderson took part in the debates in similar circumstances.


    Ummmm... nope. The new rules ("you gotta have X%) was created in the wake of Ross Perot by corporate America (of course) because they believed that was why Bush 41 lost to Clinton. John Anderson was obviously long before that when they were still doing REAL debates.


  18. by Curt_Anderson on June 20, 2024 5:05 pm
    Both Perot and Anderson were polling in the twenties. They were on a sufficient number of state ballots. They met the threshold which was the same then as now. RFK has reached neither.

    When Perot and Anderson were in the presidential debates it was September. If RFK Jr. doesn't burn through all his campaign cash he might survive long enough to be in the ABC debate.


  19. by Indy! on June 20, 2024 9:41 pm

    The other candidates should just set up their own debate. Nobody will see it, but if they were allowed in the real debates they would just be sandbagged like "both" parties always do to the candidates they don't want. The elections are rigged so only the puppets corporate America can push around get in the debates (or on the ballot). We're not Russia - but we might as well be.


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